Dear Frog Princess: A Letter of Love and Loss


Dear Frog Princess, I haven't written a letter each time something like this happens. I couldn't. Sometimes it hurts my heart too much and words don't form. I still feel like this about Charleston. Unsure as to what I should say in a letter and especially one written to you on the subject.

I'm looking at a picture of Sharonda Coleman-Singleton. A sorority sister of mine (and hopefully of yours in the future as well). I am struck by her smile. Her beauty and her last words. 

Maybe one day you will read this and wonder how things like this could happen? Perhaps a miracle formulated only by the Almighty will enter into this world and you will not fathom that deaths of people of color at the hands of an aggressor that despised them beyond belief for the color of their skin could kill like this.

But we have to prepare for the scenario that things will continue as they are and that we, ourselves, along with allies, will have to do the hard work that it's going to take.

I don't know what to tell you. How to keep you safe. Remind you how much you are loved. All I can do is wrap my arms around you, talk to you about your worth, and somehow start spoon feeding you minor details about the world around us. I have to be careful with you. You worry and I don't want you to internalize all that is happening.

I keep reminding myself of the family of those 9 souls that passed away at the hands of hate and those left behind with the terror of what they saw. In the house of God. In the place where we go to find peace, solace and connection.

I have no answers, baby girl. I just have questions. And tears. I have lots of tears for those that have been lost to us.

You are loved beyond measure as are the ones now gone.

Love from here to the sun and back, infinite times,



Of Pools and Prejudice

I saw this video early on Sunday and wondered why it wasn't all over my timeline. Although I try not to watch these videos, I had to see what it was all about so I could speak intelligently about the matter and in order for me to be able to reply to comments that I'd surely see across the internet. Check out the pool party in McKinney Texas.

I sat here with my mouth wide open. I saw a child with a grown man's knee in her back. I saw a gun being drawn on her friends. And here's where it gets interesting: I saw white men out of uniform casually walking around condoning what was happening with their silence.

Reports have since surfaced that the issues all started when adults began making racist comments to the kids invited to the pool party and telling them to go back to section 8 housing. What in the hell?!

Of Pools and Prejudice: McKinney Texas

Questions: how many black kids does it take for the white people to be intimidated? And on the other side, how many insults is it okay for a black child to endure? Why do these questions need to be asked?!?

I've seen way too many comments about how the kids shouldn't have run and how if they weren't breaking the law this wouldn't have happened. These comments probably come from the same people that think it's okay to spew racial slurs at kids. These. Are. Kids. That girl that was kneed? Is a child!

Can someone tell me what would've happened if this was a white child? Oh, that's right. This wouldn't have happened! We would've ALL been up in arms and Lord knows that officer wouldn't have had a leg to stand on the next day. But, here we are YET AGAIN, watching a child be dehumanized on camera and grown white people making assumptions of guilt and condemning these kids.

It's the neverending story. The history on repeat. My rage simmers from beneath my skin in a way that makes me want to tear it off so that it can be exposed. So that once and for all we could understand how wrong this is!

And in the midst of this, a thank you note at the pool is raised to thank the officers for keeping the white people safe. Safe from what?! From having to share a pool with the coloreds? From having to deal with a party that was not yours and that you felt the need to impose on? What are the cops keeping YOU safe from?!

My rage spills over to the men in blue whose skin is not white. At the fact that they are quite as all of this happens. That they refuse to stand up and SPEAK. Why? For a job?! What if this was their child?

The rage that lulls as I try to not think about what was done (over and over and over again) pokes its head out throughout the day. As I look at my girl and imagine her under that knee. As I think of those other kids asking questions that didn't receive an answer because they weren't SEEN as worthy of a response.

Don't get me started on the comments of those that seem to think this is okay.

Where do we go from here? What happens now? Can someone please tell me how we change this? Something has got to give. I don't have answers. Just a hell of a lot of questions.

Further Reading:

Thanks to VSB for this great post: What Those Kids In McKinney Should Have Done To Prevent The Cops From Assaulting Them

Here’s Everything We Know About the Pool Party in Texas