Crown Royal

I wish this blog was about sipping a glass of liquor with my boy Stan while wearing a tiara.  But it is not!  Yesterday, I finally made it in to the dentist to have a crown put in and let me tell you, it was anything but royal! I will say though that I have a very efficient, caring and fast dentist!  I have been going to Dr. Zulinski for over 10 years.  But no matter how much I like her, I detest sitting in that chair. I think it's the waiting that gets me.  I mean, you hear drilling and smell odd smells while sitting there and you think: I'm next! I really think that having a different sound and perhaps something that would kill the burning flesh smell would go a long way to easing my anxiety.

I was scheduled for a 2 and 1/2 hour appointment. Yeah, that's right!  Here's the thing, I couldn't get some of the work done while I was pregnant.  Then, I needed to get some kind of treatment for my gums that I couldn't get while I was nursing.  Also, every week I kept saying that I was going to schedule my appointment but somehow, saying it didn't make it so! I don't understand because once you say it enough times, it should happen automatically.  These are the rules I'd like to institute once I get a computer chip implanted in my head so that these slip ups don't happen in the future.

So, here I am.  In need of a crown and in need of a check up complete with FULL set of x-rays.  In comes Dr. Zulinski who from day one got props from me for pronouncing my first name right without needing help!  She "numbs me up". I want to say there were 4 needles but I couldn't tell you because I concentrate on closing my eyes and breathing when the needle work is coming to play.  Then I wait.  Impressions get done. I wait some more.  Finally, in she comes ready to drill.  As soon as she touches me with it, I flinch.  Um, why does this hurt after being stabbed 4 times with anesthesia?  I get more anesthesia and then she says: has this tooth been sensitive? It hasn't.  She thinks.  Tells me she's going to put desensitizer under the filler but that the tooth had been drilled down pretty close to the nerve.  I do not like how this sounds.  She further explains that, these next 2 weeks, while I wear my temporary crown, will be very telling as to whether or not I need a root canal.  I start to fantasize about nitrous oxide and ponder whether or not they have some in the office. I'm sure there will be an extra charge but, I think it's worth it.  Zulinski tells me that there's a 50/50 chance.  I begin the prayers and wonder if they'll leave me alone long enough for me to look for the gas under the cabinets.  I dismiss this idea as this new area has no doors and so, I'm sure someone will see me perusing the goods.

The reason we work well together is because we have an unspoken understanding.  She works as fast as she can and I keep my mouth open for as long as that is without taking a break so that I can get it over and done with.  The only setback to this is that I end up with a very sore jaw at the end of the session.  Especially this time. They must've taken 3 or 4 different impressions of my teeth which required me to bite down on a mold and hold it there. At one point it felt like they'd gone to lunch and left me alone with putty in my mouth.  As if that wasn't enough, with half of my mouth numb and biting down hard, I was collecting saliva at an alarming rate. I worried that I'd choke on it so I sat up this of course meant the possibility of drooling on myself.  The more I thought about not salivating, well, the more I did!  That led me to think about psych 101 and Pavlov which in turn made me think of the bell which in turn, made me salivate even more!  So, to add insult to injury, there was a little drool at one point in time from the side of my mouth that I couldn't feel.  There, now you know!

I left the dentist, still numb. And hungry.  Because I had a lunchtime meeting that got pushed back and only realized that I had that appointment about 35 minutes beforehand so I had to inhale a Nature Valley bar and try my best to swish water in my mouth while I drove though I am sure there were bits of granola in my teeth clearly visible with the naked eye.  It is what it is.  After my departure, I didn't much feel like opening my mouth, though.  I grabbed some soup from Crisper's and shared it with the frog princess when I got home.  I took some ibuprofen to ease my soreness and tried a little more soup to ease my hunger.

I woke up feeling as if someone had punched me in the jaw.  It could be because on top of everything else, I tend to lock my jaw as I sleep.  This left me thinking that this crown was going to be a royal pain in my <insert whatever word you'd like to use here>.  Rumor has it I need some old fillings replaced.  Not looking forward to it.  But this time, I will make the appointment and get it taken care of ASAP.  Because I don't want to endure any more pain than I absolutely have to.  Yes, I promise to floss and rinse and brush my teeth during work hours.  And I'm not just saying that because I distinctly recall the smell of burning flesh as I walked past a cube on my way to the bathroom.  My x-rays were left up and while the tech talked, I took the liberty of snapping a picture.  Because I know you are dying to see what my teeth look like!  In case you're wondering, the crown went on #19!  Don't ask me how they count.