Well here we are. Â I have no idea where the time has gone. Â Is it really Christmas week? Because it feels like just 2 days since my last blog! Â I love this time of the year. Â All kinds of wonderful and magical things happen. Â First off, I have new employment! Thank you Jesus! But, I digress... Now that I have a child, I thought that things might change and I'd go nuts buying things. Â Truth be told, I am simplistic at heart when it comes to Christmas. Â Now, don't get me wrong. Â I am definitely of the mindset that it's better to give than to receive. But, with The Man scouting for his next project, I am not my usual self, online shopping and finding cool things for the great people around me. Â The thing is that I always thought I'd be unstoppable when I had a baby. Â As I sat around looking for toy ideas from my many, many daily emails on parenting and the like, I realized: my frog princess doesn't need that stuff. Â What do you buy for the girl that's been a blessing to so many? I had to get the obligatory winter clothes because in case you haven't noticed, Orlando is somehow now in the midst of crazy winter weather (which actually helps people get in the spirit, I think). Â Aside from that, what else is there? A toy box for her toys, maybe some cute shoes. Â You know what she really needs? A box. Â And a couple of spoons. Â Give her that and she'll make great music for you. Â A burp cloth or blanket will also do the trick. Â She's learning to hold them over her face to play peekaboo. Â What else is there? Â And if I want to give her adventure? Sit her on the bed while her dad crawls around the floor poking his head up every once in a while. Â Shrieks of joy and laughter escape her and I cannot think of any toy that I could purchase that would bring such distinct sounds of pleasure.
Personally, I can't think of anything that I want that could be wrapped up and put under the tree. Mami is still ill with cancer. My sister is still starting a new life for herself far away in DC. Â In the midst of it all, I still find myself stressed about not doing enough. Â Christmas cards you say? Well, I was hoping to have had pictures taken at the beginning of the month but with the frog princess ill during her birthday, that went out of the window. Â Santa you ask? Um, apparently the lines to see Santa are 1 and 2 hours long. Â Have you ever been in a line for that long with a 12-month old that does not yet walk unassisted but is not in the mood to be in anyone's arms or in any type of contraption held back from exploring her surroundings? No thanks.
I have a tree dammit. Â And that should be enough. Â Oh and I didn't put it up. The Man did. Â I don't have the time, energy or inclination to try and figure out how to get all of these "things" that we set up on ourselves. Â And for what you ask? Â So that when another mom asks you, you can go down your list of accomplishments and make the other person feel like shit? Nope. I'm good.
My house is not the neatest. Â I still have boxed up books that need to be cataloged and put away in bookcases. Â Please don't ask about the pile of papers stacked everywhere. Â Between my own mail you will find stacks of bills for my mom which I am responsible for cataloging and ensuring that they get paid (which by the way, I haven't done in at least 2 months). Â I have not baked cookies and frankly don't plan on it. Â There are clean clothes sprinkled around the house like fairy dust which must be put away. Â When will I do this, you ask? I'm not sure. Â Perhaps after I get home from a day of exhausted insanity I will play with my child, put her to bed and wave my magic wand to make it all happen. Â But, I doubt it.
In the meantime, I enjoy reading all of my friends' FB updates about being done with their shopping or funny stories with their kids, driving home and looking at Christmas lights, reading Christmas books (How Murray Saved Christmas is still the funniest during this season) and trying to remember the true reason for the season. Â I remember that what I want deep in my heart cannot be purchased in a store and unfortunately, most people won't realize that until they are in a different situation than what they find themselves in today.
I just finished wrapping a few things (for my home and mami's). Â Before that, though, we took pictures of the frog princess by the tree. Â I only had a couple of gifts under the tree (because, who knew the pretty paper with ornaments on it that matched my decorations perfectly would have ACTUAL glitter on it that would get EVERYWHERE on my carpet - and the dog). Â But, seeing her stand up next to the tree I realized again that she is still the best present ever. Â And I'd exchange any gifts anyone's ever given me to watch her take her first steps.
So this Christmas, as you are running around crazy, trying to do all the things that you think you should be doing, stop and breathe. Â Then, remember all of the gifts you have given and have received that you cannot return and would never ever dream of. Â And enjoy it while you can because you never know what tomorrow holds...