"My Eye!" and Other Bedtime Fantasies

I knew this would happen.  How could I not?! I mean I did read the book and listen to Samuel L. Jackson's fabulous narration of it (if you've been living under a crib, I'm speaking about Go the F*** to Sleep). Things started slowly. Sometimes the frog princess would ask me to lie down next to her and she'd hug me and kiss me.  Who doesn't love that? Well, apparently my mami brain has me forgetting a few things.  Thank GAWD I keep this blog otherwise, how would I have remembered what a master of manipulation she is?

In the last week things escalated pretty quickly.  At first I thought it was cute. "Mama, my eye!" she would whine out holding a hand up to her eye while it was shut. I would blow in the general direction of the eye and she would say "oh, all bedda". Because we all know that mamis can do 2 things very well: kiss away the hurt and blow out the pain. On a related note, I caught her blowing on her own eye the other day in the car. She told me it worked. I can't make this up people!

As we are going through potty training, it stands to reason that the next move would be this. "Mama, pawyee!" she's say as she scrambled to her feet and hustled to pick up her burp cloth and poor Clifford who must accompany her to the bathroom.  Once there, she'd sit and then announce with a huge smile "all done!".  Chick! You haven't done anything! But, okay.  One night she got me twice with this one.  I almost tripped the first time as I ran thinking we weren't going to make it. Good times.

I will say that she does keep her routine fresh, though.  A variety of reasons come up.  The biggest ones have to do with hugs, kisses, the eye situation and the need to have the precise GPS location on not 1 or 2 or 3 but 4 stuffed animals thankyouverymuch.  The last 2 nights though, I've called her bluff fully intending to give her one of my already famous speeches about how she should not tell me she has to go potty unless she absolutely has to and she needs to cease and desist with the delay of bedtime.

Wouldn't you know it?! Two nights in a row, I've taken her to the bathroom and she has smiled up at me with what I have now coined the "potty smile" and tells me "I did it!".  So, my speech will have to wait.

In the meantime, I foresee some seriously cute excuses to avoid bedtime.  While they are aggravating, I'll be honest, sometimes it's just cute beyond words. I am happy to report that I am good at masking the smile until I have turned away from her.  But, friends, it is not easy!

Here's the part where you share and make me feel better.  What do your kids use as an excuse to not go to bed?